Chapter twelve: Kramer vs. Kramer

"I was his mommy for five and a half years. And Ted took over that role for eighteen months.”

  On his way home from work, Ted Kramer's wife Joanna has just told her toddler son that she loves him, packed her suitcase full of clothes, set her house keys with her credit cards on the table, removed her marital deposit from their savings account, and now, she's telling Ted that she's leaving him and not taking Billy, their son, with her because she's "no good for him." Joanna has to repeat herself frequently because Ted is too wrapped up in his work to listen, but when he does finally grasp what she is saying, he asks to talk and tugs her back into the house. Joanna says, as she makes her way to the elevator, "Don't make me go in there, please, please don't make me go in there! If you do, I swear one day, next week, maybe next year I don't know, I'll go right out the window." When the elevator door closes she says, red-faced and teary-eyed, "And, I don't love you anymore."

The opening scene perfectly sets the stage, because for the remainder of the movie Ted wraps his head around what happened that night. He sends out calls to Joanna's friends, thinking that she will reappear in a few hours, but she isn't back for a year an a half. Joanna's absence forces Ted to put his role as a parent ahead of his career. There are speed bumps, of course, because Billy misses his mom, and Ted has a demanding job which he is eventually let go from, but they both learn to accommodate. Being his primary caretaker, Ted's love for Billy grows by the day and is noticeable through the screen. Joanna isn't completely gone in all of this because she does write letters addressed to Billy and she watches him via the coffee shop near his elementary school, but it isn't the same as the personal contact they once had.

Personal contact is regained when Joanna files for Billy's guardianship and takes Ted to court. Through heartfelt testimony, Joanna explains to the minuscule audience,

"I know I left my son. I know that's a terrible thing to do... But in order to leave him, I had to believe that it was the only thing I could do. And that it was the best thing for him. I was incapable of functioning in that home, and I didn't know what the alternative was going to be, so I thought it was not best that I take him with me. However, I have since gotten some help, and I have worked very, very hard to become a whole human being. And I don't think I should be punished for that. And I don't think my little boy should be punished. Billy's only seven years old. He needs me. I'm not saying he doesn't need his father, but I really believe he needs me more. I was his mommy for five and a half years. And Ted took over that role for eighteen months... I'm his mother. I'm his mother."

During cross-examination, Ted's lawyer berates Joanna for being "a failure at the longest personal relationship of your life!" Various previous friends of Joanna, ones that encouraged her to leave, testify against her on Ted's behalf, stating to the court that his devotion as a father has improved significantly since she left. When Ted takes the stand, he makes this plea, "There's a lot of things I didn't understand. There's a lot of things I do different if I could... What law is it that says that a woman is a better parent, simply by virtue of her sex?"

All of this causes Joanna to think differently. Even though the court has ruled in her favor, something that Ted's lawyer warned would happen due to Billy's young vulnerable age, Joanna doesn't take Billy home with her. As they stand in the lobby of Ted's apartment complex, Joanna tells him,

"I came here to take my son home, and I realized he already is home. I love him very much. I'm not gonna take him with me."

"Can I go talk to him?" she asks. Ted leads her to the elevator, but then pauses to say, "Listen, why don't you go upstairs and see him and I'll wait here." Joanna regains her composure asking, "How do I look?" "You look terrific, Ted says. The elevator door closes once again, but this time, Joanna isn't leaving Billy, she's going to him.

Quickly, I will add that personally, I do not feel that Joanna Kramer did the right thing necessarily, but I'm not about to blame her. Everyone has their reasons for acting drastically, and she communicated her's in court. She made herself better, because she was stuck in a rut, which is a good thing. There's only so much contempt one can have towards another, and I'm not going to get mad at a fictional Meryl Streep character.

Interesting facts: 

• Playing Joanna in Kramer vs. Kramer was Meryl's first big, substantial role in a cinematic film. 

• She also didn't like Dustin Hoffman very much because of his arrogance. 

  • He actually went so far as to slap her in a take while they were filming the opening scene, and it wasn't a light slap. While it wasn't the take they used for the film, you can see his handprint on her neck in the take that they used for the movie as she's stepping into the elevator. 

  • That's not all he did. There is a scene where Joanna and Ted are in a restaurant together discussing the guardianship of their son. At the end of it, Ted throws his wineglass at the wall in anger and it shatters everywhere. This was unscripted, and Dustin didn't tell Meryl about it, so her reaction was real. But I guess she knew that the show must go on.

    • Meryl wrote her scene in the courthouse testifying for custody of Billy, because she wanted Joanna to be more than one-dimension.

As always, thank you for the entertainment, Meryl.